The Big S – it’s a new year and a new you. But does that mean cheating by adding steroids into the mix of what can already be bathroom cabinet full of vitamins, party drugs and toothpaste?

Six months ago were celebrating Pride. Six months to go and we’ll be doing it all over again. Last year was the first year that I really experienced the Pride build up, high and comedown. I seemed to have got sucked into a crowd that hadn’t taken notice of me before… The ‘a-gay’ crowd, those supposedly elite few with a bit of cash in their pocket, know all the right people and are seen in the right places.
It only happened as I’d been going to the gym a little more regularly and changed my body image, just like when I was at school (years ago) where I changed my hair style – I was taken into the more popular crowd. For me, a few simple changes, and I’m hoping my personality made me a more attractive addition to the crowd. I’ve noticed for some, it goes beyond a bit of hair gel and a protein shake and takes over their everyday routine.

Months before the Pride season kicked off some of the ‘a-gays’ were adding steroids to their already long shopping list. Anabolic (and androgenic) steroids are man-made substances related to male sex hormones. 'Anabolic' refers to muscle-building ('androgenic' refers to increased masculine characteristics). 'Steroids' refers to the class of drugs. GCSE Chemistry lesson over; if only they did teach this at school.

Steroids are available legally only by prescription, to treat conditions that occur when the body produces low amounts of testosterone, such as delayed puberty. They’re also prescribed to treat body wasting in patients with AIDS and other diseases that result in loss of lean muscle mass. If you’re a smoker you might find yourself taking prednisolone if you’ve clogged your lungs up (something I’m more used to).

Today you’ll find the ‘a-gay’ abusing anabolic steroids to enhance the size of their pecs, biceps, abs and even butt. We call this group ‘Muscles’. Anabolic steroids are taken orally or injected, typically in cycles of weeks or months (referred to as “cycling”), rather than continuously. Cycling involves taking multiple doses of steroids over a specific period of time, stopping for a period, and starting again. Signs that your ‘a-gay’ is taking steroids could include quick weight gain, aggressive behavior (roid-rage) and spot outbreaks on the face and more typically on their back.

One of my ‘a-gays’ just hit his 20’s. He’s a bright, slightly insecure, handsome but boyish lad. He’s made a conscious decision that those weren't the qualities he wanted people to see in him, at least not at first. He wanted people to see him first, and what they see these days are thick neck muscles, a powerful bulge in his arms and a chest that has been deliberately chiseled for the two-button look.

So that’s the build up to the Pride season. Gym, steroids, chicken breasts and protein shakes. I have to give credit to the ‘a-gays’ – they work their glutes off to achieve their own work of art, just to destroy it over a few weeks. During the months of July, August and part of September I built up an amazing debt of sleep not to mention my finances being in ruins. Every weekend was the same, fun, but repetitive, and every Monday I’d take stock of the weekends ritual and ask “why?”

Friday evening would mean rushing home to shower and put on a black t-shirt (supposedly it makes your biceps look bigger) my favourite pair of designer jeans and trainers. Then off to the bar to find my ‘a-gays’ have already bartered mates’ rates and their shopping list for the weekend was complete. Closing time would come, but we’d move on to either a late bar or somebody’s fabulous apartment. Finally we’d roll into bed at about 4am and wake midday to get to the next party and at that time of year there’s plenty to choose from. London Pride, Brighton Pride, Soho Pride, Manchester Pride the list goes on. The dance tents are a hive of ‘a-gay’ activity and the ‘Muscle’ group is at its prime with the shopping list being abused, lack of water and food, by the end of the day there isn’t enough Touche Eclat in the world to cover those dark circles but we gave it a damn good try. But it wouldn’t stop there! The Pride events kick out, quick shower, black t-shirt, jeans, trainers and it’s out to a club. I hardly remember seeing the sun last summer, only sunbeds. Roll on Sunday afternoon and it’s finally time to “chill out”. But this actually means use up the rest of the shopping list, drink a protein shake, and if you’re lucky enough, have sex with your fellow ‘a-gays’.

Monday morning comes and the high of the weekend soon wears off, and doesn’t come back until Friday evening when it all starts again. Come mid September the ‘a-gay’ feels drained, time to start a new cycle. Sure my 20 something mate looks hot, but they don’t look 20 anymore. What’s got into youth?

Original article written by Simon Johnson published in July 2006’s issue of axm. Adapted by Simon Johnson for publication on www.puffta.co.uk